You may have noticed a tonal shift in some of the blog posts here over the years.
In my twenties, I wanted to be quirky and unique. You saw posts here covering things like:
I wanted to be eccentric. I wanted to like things that weren’t part of the mainstream. I tried to find meaning in the things that I owned and used. Really, I think I just wanted to be special.
Staring death in the face has a way of sobering you up. When you get to a point where you truly are convinced you have reached the end of your life, things have a way of distilling and crystallizing. I’ve not looked at the world, or especially my place within it, the same since the night I thought it was all over.
I no longer have any real desire to seem unique, or special. I’m sure I do things or believe things that are a bit off the beaten path. That’s not being special, that’s just trying to be my authentic self. I want to use the things that work best, and that provide the least amount of headache or friction. There are times to make a stand, and there are times to let things go.
I don’t use double-edge safety razors any more. The truth is, I get a smoother shave with a Gillette Mach 3 while suffering way, way less irritation. I’ve tried multiple razors, dozens of blades, all the techniques, and even the face mapping thing. The truth is, none of it works as well as a nine dollar razor you can get at literally every store. And when you run out of blades? Did I mention you can find them in literally every store?!
I don’t use cast iron skillets any more, either. For one, they are insanely heavy to move around (and in the past five years I have moved around a TON). But more importantly, they’re a giant pain in the ass. You can’t use metal implements with them. You can’t leave them wet. You can’t throw them in the dishwasher. I get the same (or better!) results with a proper stainless steel pan, and when I’m done I can chuck it in the dishwasher (or, if it’s really bad, hit it with some Barkeeper’s friend).
I’ve already mentioned I fell out of love with vinyl. I’m really proud of myself for spotting it and walking away from it almost five years ago! I haven’t bought a vinyl record since, and my turntable is unplugged and unconnected in a cabinet somewhere. I should probably sell my records.
There’s a Sarah McLachlan song called “Building a Mystery” that captures the vibe of what I’m talking about. I’m no longer trying to be mysterious or unique or quirky. I’m just trying to be a normal guy. I’m just trying to be me.